CLEVELAND — The term “energy vampire” is used to describe someone who is emotionally draining in your life — think that person whose name you dread seeing pop up on your phone.
Cleveland Clinic Psychologist Dr. Susan Albers said energy vampires feed off of your willingness to listen.
“The term energy vampire is not a clinical diagnosis. It does tend to describe the characteristics of people who fall under what psychologists call the cluster B personality disorders, such as borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorders,” Albers said.
Albers said these are people who have difficulty regulating their emotions.
“People who are energy vampires often stick out like a sore thumb in your life, because they are involved in a lot of drama and they often fling that drama onto you and want you to be absorbed in it and help to fix it,” she said.
Energy vampires can usually use guilt to pull you in. Albers said its important to set boundaries.
“And these may be overt in saying, I only have 10 minutes to talk today, or covert in deciding for yourself, you’re not going to respond to any emails after 7 o’clock. You can also shield yourself in social situations, bring the third party along this is going to help to deflect some of that emotional energy from,” she said.
Its important to note that energy vampires are often not trying to be difficult.
Albers said they can sometimes be completely unaware of their impact on others. She said having a conversation with that person can be helpful . . . But be prepared for the possibility of pushback or a negative reaction.
